bMy blog entry this week is a little later than usual. Mainly because I had little to talk about. (Unusual for me!) However, if you look out for the signs, you always find something to discuss.

I was talking to a customer on the phone today and we were sharing our psychic awareness experiences. What striked us both was how similar our stories were and I thought I would share some of this with you tonight. I think it is a good idea to share psychic experiences when you are in the early stages of psychic development. Although most of the time these experiences are exhilarating and fantastic. Sometimes they are unnerving and you are left asking yourself “Am I going crazy?”

So I thought you may like to compare notes if you are going through that “Am I going crazy?” stage.

I started going to psychic development classes when I was 18. At that age I had an interest in the paranormal and the subjects of clairvoyancy and meduimship. However, I felt at the time I had no natural psychic skills and a school friend and I went just for something to do. However, as time progressed, I started to really tune into something – perhaps now I would call it a natural psychic ability.

I had a good teacher who showed me how to see and sense energies, taught me how to meditate and I started to do readings. Meditation is certainly a key in all psychic development as it shifts you conscience to feel and experience things you would not usually experience in normal day to day life. I remember when I first saw an aura – an explosion of colour suddenly appeared before my eyes as I studied the area above another students shoulder! The readings were not so easy to grasp – not because it was difficult to do a psychic reading per se. It was having the confidence it takes to actually read for someone else!

I am not really too sure how other psychics would describe how they get their information during a reading – perhaps they hear words through their guides or see images. I don’t personally have that sort of psychic link where I can hear or see my spirit guide as if they were standing right next to me. I guess the only way I could describe how I get information during my reading it that it just comes out of my mouth. I don’t think about it or try to analyse it, I just say what I get. As I said though, I suffered (and still do suffer) from a lack of confidence – you wonder if and how you can distinguish normal daily thoughts from actual messages.

Unfortunately, I never advanced any further than this as my father stopped me going to classes. (I think he thought I was trying to raise the dead or something.) After that, I lost my connection with spirit and went back to the normal day to day way of thinking.

A few years later, my father suddenly passed away which took a good a year or so to get over the shock and initial grief. It was after this period that I began looking into the whole psychic area again as I was interested in mediumship and making contact with my father in spirit. I was very lucky to have this experience as my dad visited me on more than one occasion in my dreams to let me know he was ok.

I started my development again and this time developed myself without going to classes. I joined a few internet support groups and bought a few psychic development books and began to reconnect.  I began to feel and see my guides in coloured energy and started to just “know” things without any good reason. I bought my first pack of tarot cards and began to learn the cards and do sample readings. I found that tarot boosted my confidence in my readings, the cards gave me a focus to direct the thoughts and feelings I was receiving.

I soon got to the stage where I began to freak myself out – it scared me how accurate my card readings had got and found it harder to switch off from the sights and sensations I was experiencing. I think this was my “Am I going crazy” part of my experience and began to doubt my own gifts. I locked down and cut off my abilities for a good couple of years – and this ironically was when I was running the business! I was going to Exhibits and was told on numerous occasions that I should practice Wicca, since I had all the tools and supplies about me! I started to study the craft and this gave me the focus I needed to start developing again.

I still don’t think I am at the level I was when I was freaking myself out. However, I feel a lot more grounded with my development now and I think when I get to that stage, I will not be afraid or have the doubt or lack of confidence I had before. I have experienced too much and seen too many “coincedences” to blame circumstance and there is too much good magickal energies in this cosmos to let them go to waste!